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If you have questions about this change, you're in the right place. Our editors, experts, and community of change optimists have answers!

ncgirl

Question:What does one do when theres a high stress level, and self defeating issue with food? I have had gastric bypass and gaining weight rapidly due to several issues.

I had the gastric bypass in 1999. I done wonerful for 4 years and as soon as a stressful situation hit, i began to spirual out of control, my bad eating habits came back and each time i seemed to get more and more stress on me the worse the eating got, and now i feel anger toward myself which causes me to be depressed and eat, i seem to be testing myself to then watch myself fail ,as the pounds keep going up an up? What could i do ? Im lost.

Asked by ncgirl on 10/8/08 2 Answers»
aquaskye

Answer:

You need to start giving yourself an alternate default habit instead of food when you're dealing with stress. Take 5-10 min and write down anything that makes you feel good or have ever wanted to try: meditation, walking, photography, writing/blogging, talking on the phone, reading, singing, dancing, candles, drawing, etc. Then choose a few activities that you can do anytime, anywhere or combine some: walk and take funny looking pics, light a candle and meditate on breathing (or fantasize about traveling somewhere), crank up a favorite CD and wiggle around or sing along with gusto. Whatever you pick, start telling yourself that you can go ahead and have whatever food you're reaching for (but get serious junk food out of the house right NOW), as long as you do one of your activities first for at least 15-20 min. Once you're done, then praise yourself for making a healthy choice and ask yourself if you can hold off on that food a little longer and do another activity. If you need an "interrupter" because you'll grab food before you know it, then put a thick rubber band on your wrist with the name of your favorite activity on it. Then snap it gently (just hard enough to interrupt your zombie mode, not enough to welt your skin) to remind yourself to make a conscious choice about what you're doing. It would also help if you create a safe orderly space for you to go to: a corner in your bedroom or special chair by a window. Stock your space with whatever you need to relax and do your chosen activity. Create a no-food rule for yourself: only at the kitchen table, on a plate or in a bowl, sitting down - no matter WHAT it is, even a handful of cereal. This limits the mindless food-grabbing b/c you have to prepare the table setting and it will give you another "interrupter" moment.

Answered by: aquaskye on 12/22/08
VictoriaB

Answer:

You need to know that you have the power to turn these thoughts around.

I'm going to copy something from one of our experts. I think his advice is perfect for you at this moment:

Joseph Luciani, Ph.D., author of Self-Coaching: The Powerful Program to Beat Anxiety & Depression, advises you to change the running dialogue in your head. “When it comes to any personal challenges, there are two essential components: what you tell yourself and what you believe,” he explains. “The equation looks like this: what you tell yourself, plus what you believe equals what you become. Keep in mind that this equation can be negative or positive. If you tell yourself, ‘I can,’ but you believe you can’t, then you won’t.”

Luciani suggests changing that inner dialogue in your mind by reciting these three truths:

1. No one can rescue me but me.
2. I can accept responsibility for change.
3. I have a choice regarding what I feel.

Recite each of these truths and know that YOU are the only one who can control that critical voice in your head. If negative thoughts get through or you feel discouraged, take charge and be assertive. If you stay focused on what you believe you can become, you’ll slowly notice your feelings and emotions changing for the better.

Embrace hope and realize it’s possible for you to beat depression, get your eating under control and live a happier life.

You can do it! There are more people than you know pulling for you... including now me. Best of luck to you.

Answered by: VictoriaB on 10/8/08
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