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If you have questions about this change, you're in the right place. Our editors, experts, and community of change optimists have answers!

dollydgf

Question:How to move on with my life?

After a 32 years of marriage my husband has told me he has been seeing another woman for over a year. I believe it has been a lot longer than that but I did not want to accept it. I have done nothing but build my life around him and our 2 daughters. We have a1 year old grandson and another on the way. I am left living alone and feeling lost. I feel betrayed, mad, hurt and totally torn apart.
I have many good friends and my children are very supportive of me. But still I feel so lonely and depressed. How do I move on after all those years?

Asked by dollydgf on 5/11/08 2 Answers»
GiniMaddocks

Answer:

I recommend 2 books: Eckhart Tolle's, Awaekning to Your LIfe's Purpose and don Miguel Ruiz', The 4 Agreements. This is your opportunity to awaken to THE WONDERFUL WORLD OF YOUR SELF.

When you take a step away and observe yourself going through all of this, you may come to be-friend yourself and like who you are, and see how different your decisions are when they are completely yours.

I didn't even know how I felt about certain issues until I was alone with myself. I'd always been affected by my mate and how "he" saw things, without knowing how much was not my own. Only when I had time to my self and had to voice my own opinions, did i realize how different they were from his.

I love living MY WAY now. I wish the same for you. Embrace the journey and then see how you feel about him... Your time with your grandchildren will be so precious. Maybe they need you undiluted and whole.

best wishes.

Answered by: GiniMaddocks on 5/17/08
esthechica

Answer:

Take some time to be angry, cry, and mourn the loss of your marriage. Don't blame yourself!! It's too easy to do that and ask "What if??" endlessly. Get a journal and write him letters expressing EVERYTHING. Then get online and find some groups to join - whatever your interests. The things you gave up or wanted to do but never did because you were dedicated to him. Pick one or two and make yourself go. If it's not what you want, find another group, but the important thing is go, smile, say hello and introduce yourself. Make a list and do what you want for YOU. This will give you new things and people to focus on and get you out of your head, and finding the things that will make you happy. Good luck and I'm so sorry this happened to you, but you will make it, lots of us have survived divorce!!! All the best to you!

Answered by: esthechica on 5/12/08
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