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Surviving a Holiday Split

Surviving a Holiday Split

A breakup almost always stinks, but this time of year it can be especially painful. The good news is the holidays can also serve as a wonderful distraction from your heartache—and you don’t have to worry about shelling out money for a gift (or acting delighted when he gives you socks again). Luckily, not only are there plenty of reasons to love being single at this time of year, there are lots of ways to ease your loneliness, process your feelings, and improve your mood, too. Here are some tips for getting through a breakup during the holidays:

1. Surround yourself with friends and family.
Crowded, over-priced department stores aside, this is a joyous time. Don’t sit and sulk alone at home feeling sorry for yourself. If you’re going to drown your sorrows in eggnog, at least do it in the company of friends and family who can lift you up and remind you how loved you are.

2. Engage in favorite traditions.
Whether it’s watching “A Christmas Story,” on TV for the umpteenth time or making gingerbread houses with your cousins on Christmas Eve, be sure to take part in the traditions that have always been a part of your holidays. Even if you’re sick of the same old movies and don’t even like gingerbread (or your cousins, for that matter), there’s comfort in the familiar—a happy reminder that no matter how turbulent your personal life gets, there are some things in life that never change. Besides, that scene where Ralphie’s buddy gets his tongue stuck to the frozen flagpole is always good for a laugh.

3. Focus on what you’re thankful for.
Sit down with a pen and paper and make a list. Sometimes just the act of writing it all down reminds us how much we have going for us. Forget a pros and cons list; this tally should be all positive. It’s amazing how much we have to be grateful for that we so often take for granted. Like a movie starring Brad Pitt opening on Christmas Day. “Hark, the herald angels sing,” indeed.

We know it's rough, but you will get through this. Can you share some other ways to overcome a holiday split with us?


Posted: 12/22/08
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My boyfriend left me on halloween of this year and 45 days later he died. His family did every thing to keep us apart. He knew that he was dieing when he left and ran away because he was so scared. I feel like I am on an emotional rollercoaster, it is tears at one moment, laughing at a wonderful memory at another time. I ask God why, why why? I know the answer, God wanted him home with him. Prior to meeting him I had never had a love that was so divine. I suppose that is why it hurts so much now. Christmas is a blessing because it will bring me closer to my children and our love. This is the hardest thing that I have ever experienced but know that I have to go through the grieving process no matter how much it hurts. Maybe some night soon I will be able to sleep for more than a few hours, maybe I'll not use a whole box of Klennex in a week. Maybe I will go a whole day without crying and just be thankful for all the wonderful times we had. This website is so helpful. Thank you for being here for me, in the good times and the bad. It makes life's changes so much easier.