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Author of Getting Apart Together: The Couple's Guide to a...
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Lawyer and author of Divorce and Money: Everything You Need...
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Former divorce attorney and author of How to Heal a Painful...
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I am currently being divorced by my wife of 28 years. I don't know if she has been faithful and I don't think I will ever. I still love her and wanted to try to solve our issues. That is something she doen't want now or ever according to her. I am trying to get me life back in order. Big house, kids gone, lonely, and depressed. I need direction to move on and I would love to have her return but that is going to be God's work.
| "Ariane is a new voice who can inspire and inform all of us going through change, whether it be big or small, professional or personal. The First 30 Days will encourage people going through change to go from being fearful and alone to feeling optimistic and transformed."— David Bach, New York Times best-seller | "Since change is the only constant in life, it helps to have an expert navigate through the ups and downs of life. The First 30 Days is an excellent guide."— Deepak Chopra, New York Times best-seller | "Essential reading for anyone going through a change. I loved it!"— Wayne Dyer, New York Times best-seller |
There seems to be alot of this going around. I too, am in the same situation. I am still going through all the emotions ( I am 3 months into this) and I can tell you that I am having a good day once or twice a week now. I see that it's been a few months for you as well. Counseling has helped and just trying to find a distraction every now and then. We all seem to be in a position that we didn't choose and now have work to do that we aren't thrilled about doing. I think we will all be better and stronger people in long run, but in the meantime it is a very painful experience. I sure would like to know how the person who leaves feels............relieved, sad, guilty or just glad to be done with us.
I am in the same predicament..But I was only married for 10 months..been with my husband for 5 years too..lived with each other prior to marriage..He said he needed time to think about what he wanted and decided on permanent separation..I don't even know if I would want him to return at this point--he ended our marriage over the phone and through e-mail and I think I deserved a bit better than that! I'm working on feeling better every day and saving money so I can move out of my parents place--they took me in for now but it's obviously not a permanent situation..I just can't believe someone I loved could do this to me..But I have to accept it to move on..Fizzle, good luck and try to think positive..maybe go see a therapist as this is very helpful..
Although I filed for divorce, it was also unwanted. Found out my husband was having a long term affair and was planning to leave me and the 2 children. He even was shoppong for an engagement ring! I had no choice. I have to move on and remember that life is fair. She is getting what we are now willing to let go of.. bad temper and mood swings. I need to look forward and luckily I have lots of siblings for support.
Hi fizzle20,
I am in the same boat, and it is awful. My husband of 28 years just left, no real reason, just wanted to leave because he needed to clear his head?!?! Who does this after so long? What is worse, I still would take him back. I think I need some help with co-dependency. He has walked out on a long term commitment and I am still pining for him...
I too am in a big house, alone for the first time and it is scary as hell. But we are survivors and we will survive this and more. Enjoy your time alone and use it to collect your thoughts and ideas about how to live each day one day at a time and realize that you are lovable and will come through this!