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Katie Danziger

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Gerald Levin

Presiding director of Moonview Sanctuary and former CEO of...

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Gary King

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Top 5 Things to Do

Whether you’re facing a change that life has handed to you or embarking upon a change that you’ve always wanted to make, it’s natural to find change hard. Thankfully, there are ways to make change easier and ensure you’re doing more than getting through. If you do nothing else, try these five tips to move through the first 30 days of any change with ease.

1. Change your thoughts.

People who navigate change successfully believe that from any change, even the most painful, something positive will eventually come. Too often we turn to disempowering questions like: “Why did this happen to me?” or “How will I ever get through this?” Instead try new, uplifting questions like: “What can I learn from this change?” or “How is this change helping or protecting me?” The good that comes from change may not be directly connected to what you’re going through—often it’s not—and it may not arrive when you want or expect it to, but something positive will always come into your life.

2. Activate your change muscle.

You’re stronger, smarter and more capable than you have ever imagined. You have an inner core of strength, a change muscle, that has helped you through numerous changes in the past and will help you through the changes you will face in the future. Human beings are designed to be resilient and to survive. You have the power to get through any change that comes into your life or to succeed at any change you want to make.

3. Welcome challenging emotions.

During change it’s completely natural to feel one or more tough emotions. You may experience fear and doubt or guilt and shame. Positive or painful, all emotions exist to guide us through change. Challenging emotions help you get back on track by alerting you to how you don’t want to feel and reminding you of how you do want to feel. And every painful emotion can be easily replaced with a positive emotion that will help you get through change with less stress and anxiety.

4. Ask for help.

It’s completely normal to feel alone during change. You may think that nobody has ever gone through what you’re experiencing or that others are too busy to give assistance. Change is always easier when you let others in and there are so many people just waiting to give you support. Create a team of people who can help—family, friends, co-workers, clergy members or people who have gone through similar changes. Remember, when you ask for help, you’re never alone.

5. Take action.

When going through change, it’s natural to feel stuck. But there are many things you can do to facilitate the transition.

  • Take care of your health. During change, it’s easy to neglect your wellbeing; instead be sure to eat right, exercise, get enough sleep and drink plenty of water.
  • Make a plan. Take some time to figure out how you’re going to move through change. List the people you can turn to for help, outline your new beliefs about change or create a step-by-step action plan to help you realize a change you’re hoping to make.
  • Help others. Supporting someone else is an excellent way to take the focus off your own situation, while reminding you of your ability to give and reconnecting you with your strength and power. You can help an elderly neighbor with her grocery shopping, take a friend out to dinner or make an overdue call to a family member.
Posted: 12/16/07