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Our Grieving Experts

Dr. Therese Rando

Dr. Therese Rando

Psychologist, grief specialist and author of How to Go on...

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David Kessler

David Kessler

Journalist, author and motivational speaker

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Helen Fitzgerald

Helen Fitzgerald

Certified death educator, author and lecturer

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Top 5 Things to Do

You’re probably feeling a bit lost, somewhat scared and indescribably sad, but getting through the first 30 days of grieving the death of a loved one is not an impossibility. Through the guidance of professional bereavement coaches, we’ve pinpointed five vital suggestions to see you through this trying time:

1. Give yourself time to grieve.

There’s no right or wrong way to grieve. The first and most important thing to remember is that whatever you’re feeling or not feeling, you are not going crazy, nor are you “wrong.” Grief is as unique as each individual. Allow your mind and body to dictate how you feel and give yourself permission to feel it.

2. Let friends and family help.

Too many of us are control fanatics who think we have to take on the problems in our lives on our own. Your close friends and family want to help you through this painful time; allowing them to do so benefits you both. You’ll be eased of some burdens and they’ll feel good about having lightened your load a bit.

3. Take care of yourself.

In times of high stress, people often forget to do the small essentials, like eating and sleeping. Having at least one healthy meal a day will increase your energy and provide the nutrition you need to get through this stressful time.

4. Do your research.

Reading a book or watching a video about people going through similar situations will help you understand the grieving process. This helps to normalize the strong feelings and emotions that may seem awkward or scary to you.

5. Remember the good times.

It’s important to remember all the good things about the person who has passed. Some find solace in looking through old pictures. Others enjoy watching a favorite movie of the deceased. Many listen to songs that remind them of the good times. Talking about the good old days is a great way to help children deal with their grief, as well.

Posted: 11/19/07