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Question:this is for my friend, how can I make him stop blaming himself?

He was married for 25 yearsand she left him for someone eles, he keeps saying he could of should of done something different, I dont belive that , she fell out of love but he doesnt get it.. Can anyone help??

Asked by neecha on 4/30/08 3 Answers»


you know jesus says come unto him all that is heavy laden and burden and i'll give you rest. sometimes we can do all we can for a person or a marriage or whatever, and it seems like it is never enough. and when someone or something disrupt our lives we start blaming ourselves, but when that something disrputs it is because it has no peace within itself and the closes thing to it feel the burden because it can not find peace within itself. it does not matter how long it was if it was for 25 mins.(laugh) if there is no love for one self how could you really love someone esle. jesus is the only one that has a answer for you, just listen when he speaks because he does talk to us. you will know what to do then in the mea while don't blame youself. peaceful1

Answered by: peaceful1 on 5/19/08


It sounds like a case of the 'grass is greener on the
other side'. At least his wife thinks so. Tell him to
hang-low for awhile. It is doubtful that her new relationship will work out. Especially once she starts
seeing the red flags with her new so and so. Give it
some time: she just may be running back faster than
she left.

Giving up 25 years is not easy. I have a hunch she
will be back to try and patch things back up. So if
your friend really loves her, then he will be willing to
wait it out. By all means, he doesn't need to go and
jump into another relationship. He needs to wait at
least one year. But if he loves her, then he will be
willing to wait longer. Good things are worth waiting

He needs to be honest with himself and pray to GOD
about it. Pray and listen to GOD. This is what he
needs to do now. GOD can move mountains. GOD
answers prayers!
In Christ's Love,

Answered by: cactusgirl08 on 5/16/08


you have to try and make him understand that everyone goes through life changes and that sometimes people grow a part in life and that it takes two people to make a marriage work and it takes two to make it fail as well

Answered by: Lisa0368 on 5/1/08
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