"The day was life changing for me. Ariane was one of the best and most moving speakers I saw at the conference and by 10am Ariane's book, "The First 30 Days: Your Guide to Any Change" was already sold out." -Chrissiana
Read More Testimonials»

Our Finding Romance Experts

Wendy Atterberry

Wendy Atterberry

Contributing writer for The Frisky

Shared by First30Days View Profile»
Helen Fisher

Helen Fisher

Anthropologist, author and advisor to Chemistry.com

Shared by First30Days View Profile»
Amber Dotts

Amber Dotts

Motivational speaker and coach of workshop series "The Three...

Shared by First30Days View Profile»

Meet all of our Relationships Experts»

Got a Question?

Q&A

If you have questions about this change, you're in the right place. Our editors, experts, and community of change optimists have answers!

mendy_aka_men

Question:i have been divorced for at least 1 year and after my ex i can trust anyone let alone men how can i get over this?

i was dating a black man that went to prison for sexually abusing a yound girl and at some point met a mixed man from what ive been told the other bm introduced us . anyway we talked and stuff and he asked me to marry him and we did get married thru the prison "just signed some papers" and all the time we were married he was either cheating on me or asking me 4 money, and he had threatened me that if i ever divorced him then he would have his "mafia" family he was half african american half italian anyway hed have the mafia do something to my family. so after a while he moved in with this girl and her family at the time she was 15 maybe 16 and after some legal issues with both of them i ended up doing something really bad and tried to commit suicide and since then i have a head injury my short term memory is bad. so it just seems like since then i cant trust anyone new i meet id like to date again but how can ever trust a man again and get over that i do talk to a therapist but i just dont know what else i can do im confused do you have any suggestions?

Asked by mendy_aka_men on 8/18/08 2 Answers»
veartwani

Answer:

Hello

My name is veart(single). I was impressed when i saw your profile today at and i will like to establish a long lasting relationship with you. In addition,i will like you to reply me through this my private e-mail box(veartwani@ymail.com)
Thanks
waiting to hear from you soon.
veart
I will send to you my pictures in my next mail through this my mail box

veartwani@ymail.com

Answered by: veartwani on 3/13/13
springshine

Answer:

Hi, Mendy

Not every man is unfaithful. You might want to try getting involved with people who are known to be more trustworthy. Do you attend church where you live? Making friends with people from a work group, school group or religious group might give you the opportunity to see healthier relationships in action and find one of your own.

And, continue to talk to your therapist about this. I'm sure he or she can be helpful to you in terms of putting the pieces together, asking the hard questions and looking inside to find the answers.

Many women suffer from low self esteem which often results in a feeling that we don't deserve any better than we get, but this is not true. You deserve the best. Try to feel a little bit better about yourself, treat yourself right and ask others to treat you right as well. If you devalue yourself you set an example for others.

Love yourself and know that you are loved and that someday you may find someone you deserve who will love and respect you the way it is meant to be.

Answered by: springshine on 8/18/08
Got an Answer?