First 30 Days Blog

29 jun

Dark Days

All my life, I have had periods of time where I felt down, kind of sad but I would come out of it and be happy again. Now I can’t seem to find the happiness I once had. I struggle each day to get the things done that need to be done. I can’t seem to find any pleasure in spending time with my family or friends, I want to be alone all the time. i am overweight. I am overwhelmed most of the time. I wish life was simpler. How do I get that happiness back, how do I get my life back?

Shared by mydreams39.

Posted by First 30 Days on June 29th, 2009 in Personal Stories | 4 comments

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  • You wanted me to pinpoint times that I am happy. Today i have been feeling very anxious, not sure why but my anxiety was very high. I went for a walk with my son. It is a nice day, the sun felt good. We picked wild strawberries along the side of the rode. I realized that this is when I feel the most happy, when things are simple and carefree. I am not trying to be someone I am not. I am not a business woman and I don’t like dealing with everything that goes along with it. I have a job, I am a nurse. I like that I can work my shift, do a good job, and then come home and not have to think about it until the next shift. Our business is based from home so I never get away from it.
    I just wanted to say that it is nice to have a reply, finally someone is listening to me.

    Shared by mydreams39.

    — Added by admin on August 24th, 2009
  • Thank you for the reply. The last time I was truly, truly happy was about 5 years ago. I had lost 30 pounds and I was so proud of myself for doing it. I did it on my own with diet and exercise. My body felt good, I had lots of energy and I liked what I saw in the mirror. Our business was doing well also, clients were calling constantly, we were expanding and money was coming in. That lasted about 2-3 years. I have since gained all the weight back and business is not going so well. I am under constant stress. My husband won’t talk about it with me because he knows how much it bothers me. He is the eternal optimist. I am not very optimistic right now. It has drawn a wedge between us that I don’t know if it can be repaired. I don’t know where to start, what is the first step to get out from under this dark cloud?

    Shared by mydreams39.

    — Added by admin on August 24th, 2009
  • Now that’s a comment, nessagirldc. Thanks.

    Shared by cobber.

    — Added by admin on August 24th, 2009
  • Hi there – MyDreams (what a great name by the way)!
    I can totally relate to those periods of being up and down. I went through that for several years. At the time I was at the mercy of my emotions (If I “felt” bad, it was going to be bad day. If I “felt” great, I could take a sigh of relief because I had hope for a good day). Now, I’ve learned that I have far more control over my emotions than I thought, and I’m no longer a victim to them. As a life coach, I get the privilege of helping other people master their emotions as well.
    What’s great about you is that you know what happiness is, you’ve experienced it before, which means you can experience it again – and there’s a way to do that! (There’s HOPE – Yay! :-)) Whenever you feel any emotion – there’s a certain pattern that accompanies that feeling:
    (1) A way of using your body (e.g. smiling, laughing, etc.)
    (2) A way of thinking (e.g. thinking about how great it is to be in that place or with that person)
    (3) A way of speaking (what you’re saying to yourself or to the other people around you).
    So, if you’re open to a dialogue about this (and a little homework), let’s test it out! Think about the last 2 times you were happy…It doesn’t have to be some monumental occasion – just think about the last time you felt a glimmer of happiness, and answer the 3 questions above. What were you doing with your body? What were you thinking or focusing on? And what were you saying? If you can’t think of a time when you were happy, think about somebody YOU KNOW who is happy and answer the questions using them as your model. Conversely, think about the last 2 times you were sad or depressed? Answer the same three questions for those two scenarios as well. I think you’ll notice a pattern. Once you do it, I can show you what that means and how you can use what you learn to help get your happiness back. You might be super surprised with what you’ll notice!
    I look forward to hearing back from you. Thank you for being open. So many people (myself included) have struggled with the same thing, so your openness is going to help many people who read this.
    All the best,

    Shared by nessagirldc.

    — Added by admin on August 24th, 2009

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