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Feel Cared About

Speaking from an open heart can seem so vulnerable. Yet naming your truth with simplicity and sincerity, and without contentiousness or blame, has great moral force.

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Our Stepparenting Experts

Jeannette Lofas

Jeannette Lofas

Founder of the Stepfamily Foundation

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Sally Bjornsen

Sally Bjornsen

Creator of the Sassy Stepmother web site and author of The...

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Dr. Carl Pickhardt

Dr. Carl Pickhardt

Psychologist and author of Keys to Successful Stepfathering

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Got A Tip?

Tips

Have Patience

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Remember that this transition will take some time, so ease yourself into your new roles as spouse and stepparent. Don’t expect everything to be perfect right away, and don’t expect to know exactly how to “act” in this situation. If you keep this in mind as you proceed through the first 30 days, you’ll be less likely to be so hard on yourself when you hit any bumps in the road.

Be sure to proceed with caution when dealing with your new stepchild, too. He or she is being asked to adjust to many changes within a short period of time. Give your stepchild lots of time to adjust to you, and to you him or her. Your stepchild may view you as an outsider who is intruding on the family for quite a while. That’s a normal feeling.

For now, sit back and simply observe how this family functions. Don’t involve yourself in the day-to-day operation at this juncture, even if that’s what you and your partner intend for you to do down the line. Then, lace up your shoes, grab a bottle of water and get ready to climb high.

Posted: 2/12/12