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owensrg

Question:What actions can I take to win my wife back and stop the divorce?

My wife and I have been together for 6 years, married for 4 and 1/2 years, have been separated for 2 months, and have a 2 yr old daughter. Things have been bad for about a year but she has been suffering for longer than that. I was a selfish, prideful, angry person who often lashed out at her because I was upset with my life. I filed the divorce papers but now I am fighting for the marriage. That is because I realized that I was the problem, her reactions/attitude was based on my actions.

Over the past 2 months I have made positive changes in my life and have completely reprogrammed my way of thinking. I know respond with kindness instead of anger. Her defenses are still up though. I have quit smothering her but still do small, nice gestures for her. Is this good? It seems to be finally working but I do not want to pressure or push her away. Fortunately we stay in contact because of my daughter so I am an active part of her life. I am searching for any and all help and advice because I do not want to divorce her. My love for her has never been greater. I have made honest and sincere changes and I am becoming the person she has always hoped I would be. She deserves to be loved but I fear that I may be too late. What can I do?

Asked by owensrg on 9/30/10 Answer»