The Heart to Forgive

People say that they would never do it, and yet infidelity happens. What would you do if your partner cheated on you after decades of marriage? Could you find it in your heart to forgive? How long and difficult would the road to recovery be? What makes someone commit the ultimate betrayal?

These are the questions that author Mimi Gabriel addresses in her fictionalized memoir The Heart to Forgive: Reclaiming our Relationship After Infidelity. It aims to help others struggling to overcome infidelity through real-life stories told from the author's perspective as well as her husband, Les Gabriel.

While Mimi and Les were able to move past the infidelity her husband brought to their 27-year marriage, it’s important to ask yourself if you could do the same. Once you’ve decided on your position, discuss this with your significant other (ideally before you’re married—it can be part of a wedding planning discussion, along with other major deal-breakers, such as having kids and managing finances.) Even if you’ve already married, talking about the possibility of cheating and its effects can improve your relationship. Remember not to freak out if your partner’s response isn’t what you expected. Hear him/her out, put on your empathy hat, and see if you can’t see his/her point of view.

What’s your position on infidelity? Have you discussed it with your spouse or significant other? What was the outcome?

—Laura Lee Bloor