"Ever since I subscribed to your site the daily reminders are the only thing I read apart from email and the NY Times headlines and weather. I am hugely critical of most self-help information, but this is not what your site is. I save 1 in 2 of these and have kept a library folder. They are intelligent, concise, relevant and are pitched at exactly the right level." -Martin Chalk, CEO, Balance Water
Read More Testimonials»

Our Finding Romance Experts

Wendy Atterberry

Wendy Atterberry

Contributing writer for The Frisky

Shared by First30Days View Profile»
Helen Fisher

Helen Fisher

Anthropologist, author and advisor to Chemistry.com

Shared by First30Days View Profile»
Amber Dotts

Amber Dotts

Motivational speaker and coach of workshop series "The Three...

Shared by First30Days View Profile»

Meet all of our Relationships Experts»

Got a Question?

Q&A

If you have questions about this change, you're in the right place. Our editors, experts, and community of change optimists have answers!

runnindownadream

Question:Is he just a muse? Or am I really in love?

I've recently been spending a lot of time with this friend I met a year ago. He's a really amazing and creative guy and I love talking to him about art and writing. He has a girlfriend, so he's off limits. I also don't think I'd ever want to date him just because our lives are so different. But I can't stop thinking about him! Whenever I'm working on a new project he's the first one I want to tell about it and I'm always stoked to get positive feedback from him. The feelings I have for him aren't like the romantic ones I'm used to. It's so confusing! Can anyone relate? Is there such a thing as a guy muse?

Asked by runnindownadream on 10/23/08 3 Answers»
aliciak

Answer:

Yeah sure! If you're feelings aren't like the romantic ones you're used to like you say, then I guess it's possible! On the other hand, sometimes romantic feelings aren't there from the beginning--I've been in that situation too!

How do you think he feels about you?

Answered by: aliciak on 11/1/08
kristen

Answer:

I have a guy muse. He's fantastic, I love sharing my work with him and just letting him fill me up creatively, challenge me, etc.

As long as you can be clear about the feelings you have I think they're fine. It's wonderful to have someone who you can share this part of your life with! Just keep it to that and you'll be fine.

Answered by: kristen on 10/24/08
AnnieChance

Answer:

I am thinking there is such a thing as a guy muse! Why not? It's the aughts. Women can have muses that are not female! You sound like you've found a really great friend, and I think you are pretty clear that you don't have romantic feelings for him, so go with it! I sort of had a friend like that in high school—Brian B. We were attached at the hip but I would never date him. We still stay in touch to this day! So I say go with it and enjoy!

Answered by: AnnieChance on 10/24/08
Got an Answer?