"Je trouve votre site absolument superbe!" -Kathya
Read More Testimonials»

Our Finding Romance Experts

Wendy Atterberry

Wendy Atterberry

Contributing writer for The Frisky

Shared by First30Days View Profile»
Helen Fisher

Helen Fisher

Anthropologist, author and advisor to Chemistry.com

Shared by First30Days View Profile»
Amber Dotts

Amber Dotts

Motivational speaker and coach of workshop series "The Three...

Shared by First30Days View Profile»

Meet all of our Relationships Experts»

Got a Question?

Q&A

If you have questions about this change, you're in the right place. Our editors, experts, and community of change optimists have answers!

traxatmsu

Question:in my 32 years of life I have never had a romantic relationship, I have a dozen stories that end the same way.:) After a couple of weeks every girl tells me the same thing. You are a perfect man, i love hanging out with you, I like you, you are exactly

Asked by traxatmsu on 3/15/10 1 Answer»
traxatmsu

Answer:

opps I just noticed that this cut off.
"in my 32 years of life I have never had a romantic relationship, I have a dozen stories that end the same way.:) After a couple of weeks every girl tells me the same thing. You are a perfect man, i love hanging out with you, I like you, you are exactly what I want in a guy that I want to date longterm, you are attractive, fun, a sweet heart, and more but.... there is just no spark.

They have told me their stories about sparks, but they all ended in very miserable relationships. I believe that I am all those things that they say and mothers that I meet and older women that I work with also think that I am "quite the catch"
I usually try the friends thing as they ask but it does not last long for all sorts of different reasons.

What is a guy to do?
There is a very recent occurrence of this and she is the first that said lets be friends and a major connection has happened. A connection that neither of us can explain. She writes things like
"I know our connection is strong and I feel that too" and "I think every encounter is meaningful no matter how brief, but not all are significant. I have no doubt that my relationship with you has great significance in our lives. There is no other reason for this type of connection."
but it is always followed by I just don't see us in a romantic relationship."

Meanwhile we still spend a lot of time together. Equal time that I would expect if I were dating someone. The only time that I got very confused was one night when we were watching a movie and she made her way into my arms. The next day she wrote an email explaining that she has not changed and feels guilty for laying ("it just felt so natural" she says) in my arms since she knows I like her."

Answered by: traxatmsu on 3/16/10
Got an Answer?