Archive for August, 2010

The Fortune Cookie Made Me Do It!

I was rifling through my wallet the other day in search of a stamp and out fell an old fortune-cookie fortune which read “Organize your life around your dreams and watch them come true.” It stopped me in my tracks! There I was trudging through my long checklist of tasks for the day and 99.9% of them had absolutely nothing to do with my passion goals.

I know I’m not unique. We all have the day-to-day stuff to do. But often, we put in most of the work on tasks that are easiest, or that are within our comfort zone, or that numb us so that we don’t have to face the fear, angst, or criticism that could come with stepping out and finding our joy.

That moment I recommitted. I decided to “Show up!” and get more disciplined around my passion goals, “the work,” as Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love, says in her talk on Nurturing Creativity. (Check it out!)

I’m going to do my part. I’m going to show up and put more energy into the work that lifts me and brings joy, I pray, to others. And I will have no doubt that with this commitment and discipline that the gifts will come.

Thank you fortune cookie — that I didn’t actually eat! — or thank you Divine, Beloved, who dropped that reminder right into my lap when I needed it most. So, forgive me all if I get even more bodacious about my journey. The fortune cookie made me do it. Be well!

If you felt moved, inspired, touched, helped, annoyed, or anything after reading this, please let us know. Our wonderful bloggers really do appreciate your comments and feedback. It’s super easy and takes a minute. Click on comments below.

Posted by Tracye Warfield on August 7th, 2010 in New Directions, Personal Stories, Uncategorized | No comments

Thoughts by Tracye

Finding the “YES!”

Believe the universe is conspiring to support you,” my yoga instructor offered as the sweat poured from my body and my mind screamed “You can’t do this today! Child’s pose, just child’s pose! As a matter of fact, you’re crazy to believe you can succeed with any of your silly ideas.”

I was completely lost in the “No” moment that morning. I walked into the studio in the “No” mind space. Stuck! At least I thought. But yoga is an interesting thing. The more I focused on the breath, the more I focused on the flow of my body, the more I opened my mind to the possibility – to the “Yes!” that could be if I let it.

The moment was mine. I could give in to the ridiculous notion of fear and failure or I could flow right through it and know without a doubt that the universe truly is conspiring to support me! Which do you think I chose? Which do you choose?

Try turning your “No” moments into “Yes!” this year and see what happens.

1. Take mental (maybe written!) note of how often your mind goes to the “No” place in one day and possible reasons?
2. Write down all of the times that “Yes!” changed your life in a positive way.
3. Enlist the help of “Yes!” buddy to support your journey.

Trust and see yourself as the superstar that others do. Know that the moment is yours if you choose. Be well!

Drop that Dead Weight!

I think of my marathon running days. I can never carry all those gadgets, backpacks, water, sports drinks, goo, etc. It’s just too heavy. The race is way too long and hard for all that crap. I feel weighed down during a time when I need to feel like I could fly.

Drop it! In my first long race years ago, I remember tossing stuff along the roadside. I had to get lighter and keep moving to the finish line. Relying on my mental strength, my team and volunteers at the water stops was my only choice.

In yoga class, people arrive and set up “their” spot with the fancy mat, eighteen water bottles, special towel, and anything else they can find to get the perfect flow. Perhaps distractions? A little dead weight? I’m just saying. Drop it!
As you look at your life, ask yourself “How much dead weight am I carrying?” What’s got to go?

On a recent trip a beloved friend reminded me to question the value-add of the people, events, and possessions in my life. Is there someone, something, some place that is holding you back from your true self? Your destiny? Your peace? Your freedom?

So how do you know? Oh, you know! And if for some reason you’re not listening to your own voice or heart and still can’t figure it out, ask The Divine. Then listen and do –the hardest part being the “do.” I know this personally, so here are a few suggestions from someone in the active “Drop it!” state:

1. Get with your Real Team – Who are the people who keep it real in your life? Who will honestly and out of true love tell you when you’re wrong, someone is wrong for you, or something is wrong. Listen and do.
2. Be honest with yourself – It’s hard and exhausting to toss all dead weight at once. Take it a pound at a time.
3. Stay on the lookout for volunteers and water stops along the way – If we pay attention we will find that help and cheers are available everywhere.
4. Go to The Divine – Humble yourself and know that there is a greater source. Be guided.

The journey of living and being well is about releasing that which holds of from love, from freedom. Drop it! Drop it by the roadside and keep moving to the finish line! I know that’s my focus. What about you? Life is waiting. Be well!

Tracye Warfield is a Registered Yoga Teacher (RYT) with Yoga Alliance, Certified Infant Massage Teacher (CIMT), and a self-taught accomplished chef. After a successful career in banking, Tracye decided it was time for a lifestyle change. She has been practicing yoga since 1999. She began her metamorphosis in the California Bay Area. Through the practice of yoga, a stronger focus on eating healthy and achieving a greater understanding of nature, her life and spirit have been transformed. Tracye feels it is now time to share her life alteration and all its responsibilities, with the world.

In 2007 she published a cookbook, Experience Dinner – Recipes by Tracye Warfield and embarked on a career as a personal chef with varied clients throughout the New York metropolitan area. Her success was nearly instant, her menus often provocative and her ingredients are always natural and when possible, organic.

She received her yoga-teaching certificate at the acclaimed Yoga Sutra studio in New York City with a focus on studies drawing upon the traditions and principles of Ashtanga, Vinyasa, and Iyengar yoga. She received her infant massage certificate with industry leader, Tina Allen of LiddleKidz in 2009 which provided a way to work with entire families focused on the healing powers of touch and the ever lasting love that touch draws upon.

She formed her company bytracye in November of 2007 with a focus on mind, body, spirit and food. What is bytracye all about? Well, Tracye says: “We want to create for each of our clients, a wonderful holistic experience in all that we do.” We want our love of life to be present either in studio or in the kitchen and our only measure of success is client happiness.”

If you felt moved, inspired, touched, helped, annoyed, or anything after reading this, please let us know. Our wonderful bloggers really do appreciate your comments and feedback. It’s super easy and takes a minute. Click on comments below.

Posted by Tracye Warfield on August 3rd, 2010 in Diet and Fitness, Health, New Directions, Spirituality, Uncategorized | 1 comment Read related posts in personal support

Where Does Your Time Go?

Would You Hire Your Personal Management Team?
(The ones in the mirror)

When you gain clarity around your money relationship one of the most positive results is that you become aware of how and with whom you spend 2 precious commodities: your time and your energy. Your priorities become straight and your energy is used more wisely as you become cognizant of the fact that a prosperous life is one where you use your energy towards things that deepen your sense of purpose and well being.

The simplest way to get awareness around your Time, Energy, Money factor is to track everything you do in a day. Then, go through each activity and ask

* How much time did it take?
* How much of my energy did it require of me? What is the quality of energy I received in the doing of it?
* How much money did it cost? Or how much money did I make given the Time and Energy I put into t?

What matters to you? What activities could you curtail or give to someone else?
Do you create busy work for yourself as a form of procrastination – a form of resistance? I remember how lost I felt when I first hired someone to assist me with administrative work. All this freed up time showed me how I was kidding myself. The “if only I had someone to help me” tape was no longer valid and now I was scrambling to find things for her to do! Uncovering the true motivations behind my habits of fear and resistance helped me move through to a more effective way of being.

When I started tracking my money I realized I was spending an extra 45 minutes to an hour waiting in long lines at the grocery store, at the end of long days when I was super tired and would have rather been at home. Now I get in my big weekly shopping which gives me extra time, let’s me apply my energy and focus on things I consciously know will support my purpose in life. And, it requires me to be more organized about my food because I have to plan ahead. Seemingly small things create a much bigger impact in other areas of your life – well beyond your Time + Energy + Money factor.

A client who started tracking her money noticed she was spending an inordinately high amount on taxi cabs. An actress who held a full time administrative job, she took auditions on her lunch hour. When I asked her why she took so many cabs she said she was always running behind because she was exhausted. “Why?” Because she didn’t get enough sleep. Long story short, she started taking her self care regime seriously, got to bed earlier and now that she was aware of her Time + Energy quotient, planned ahead and started walking to auditions. She slipped in some exercise and she saved money. What initially appeared to be an overspending issue was at its root a Time + Energy issue.

The equation that Time + Energy = Money is true but I look at it this way: Money allows us to do what we want with our Time + Energy.

This week, make an effort to track where you are spending your time and consciously analyze the decisions you make about your priorities. After all, if you aren’t running your life – who is?

If you felt moved, inspired, touched, helped, annoyed, or anything after reading this, please let us know. Our wonderful bloggers really do appreciate your comments and feedback. It’s super easy and takes a minute. Click on comments below.

Posted by Helen Kim on August 3rd, 2010 in Finances | 1 comment

8 Ways to Prosperity

1. Forgive yourself and others for any financial trespasses

If you are gripped by the past or still upset by financial indiscretions, you are not allowing yourself to move forward. A great deal of this is about boundaries. Have you consciously decided what kinds of financial behaviors you are wiling to accept from yourself and others? How far you are willing to go for someone and how far you are willing to let someone go for you, financially-speaking? The harder it is to create a boundary, the more important it is to create it.

2. Take Extreme Physical Care of yourself. If you’re not well cared for, your ability to prosper suffers. Are you getting enough exercise, sleep and healthy foods into your week?

How about making a conscious effort to eat foods that are not only yummy but best of all have what I consider to be, “medicinal effects”? (You can call me “Flax Seed Queen” now.. I finally admitted that as much as I want to, I just don’t have the time to get to the gym or yoga studio on a consistent basis and needed to come up with something that suits my lifestyle. Enter “Sneaky Fitness”, a great program for busy people created by Berrnadette Penotti. No matter where I am, I can always manage to sneak in 10-30 min of some simple aerobic and core strengthening exercises that elevate my heart and lenghthen my body.

Do you know the brain scientist, Jill Bolte Taylor – the one who wrote “A Stroke of Insight” and not only lived to share the process of her stroke and her recovery with us, but to tell us that “living in the right brain” or “Nirvana” as she puts it, is only moments away for all of us? She credits sleep as one of the most important reasons her body was able to recover from her stroke. I know that when I don’t feel my best, it impacts by moods and energy levels which impacts my ability to maintain the standard I need to sustain wealthy thoughts and actions.We’ve got to respect the wisdom of our body; it never lies.

3. Understand that Money has no power (only the power that you give it)

The source of your supply comes from within. You are your re-Source. Until this very basic principle is learned and accepted life will give you plenty of opportunities to master this. The greater your sense of consciousness the bigger the receptacle into which money will flow towards and from you.

4. Research your future
Put real numbers to everything you want in your life, even if the money hasn’t shown up yet. Get your “dream life” out of your thinking mind. Stir your pots. For example, if you dream about buying real estate find out just what your dream house costs. Consult with real estate agencies; find out what kind of mortgage you would get, how much down payment you need, what it would cost to run it….
The more specific and directed you are towards growing and maintaining your wealth, the faster you will receive it. By doing this, you show yourself that you are serious. Money loves clarity.

5. Keep a Spending Diary in order to understand your Triggers.
(I know, I know. You’ve heard me say this a lot – but have you tried it : )? A few days after you track everything you buy, go through the list of items bought and ask:

1. Does this have the same value today that I thought it would when I purchased it?
2. What mood was I in when I bought this?
3. Have I used this yet?

This exercise has helped a lot of my clients learn about some of their financial triggers and helps you learn to be proactive, not reactive.

6. Track your Time, Energy and Money
Many sabotaging behaviors that prevent us from prospering come from unawareness of how we spend our Time + Energy (see last newsletter article here). Try tracking all your activities from the moment you wake up to the moment your head hits the pillow. Then ask yourself these questions about every activity;

1. How much time did this take?
2. How much energy did it require of me and what was the quality of energy I received in the doing of it?
3. How much did it cost or did I make?
4. On a scale from 1-5, was it worth the Time, Energy and Money spent and/or made?

I have said time and time again (no pun intended) that fogginess of how we use our time and energy is a huge culprit re: thriving your wealthy self. I’ve noticed how successful entrepreneurs whom I admire respect Time; they show up on time, they deliver on time, they stick to the agreed to amount of time. This is so huge I’ve invited Organizing Guru Julie Morgenstern to join me on “Conscious Wealth” (www.HayHouseRadio.com) as we talk about decluttering our lives in order to have enough time to create wealth (and remember it’s a call in show, so we would love to answer your questions!). Money allows us to do what we want with our time and energy.

7. Understand that everything, every situation, is temporary.
Whether you have more than or less than enough money to cover your needs and desires right now, your financial situation is temporary. Money, like your breath, needs to flow in AND out.

8. Keep in touch with your money.

Show up for your money. Stealing a line from Tom Cruise in Jerry McGuire, “Help it help you”. Visit with it consistently. Financial Expert Galia Gaichon recommends we set aside 15 minutes/week – that’s all! I have incorporated that into my lifestyle now and find it ends up saving me time in addition to staying close to my financial pulse.

If you felt moved, inspired, touched, helped, annoyed, or anything after reading this, please let us know. Our wonderful bloggers really do appreciate your comments and feedback. It’s super easy and takes a minute. Click on comments below.

Posted by Helen Kim on August 3rd, 2010 in Finances | No comments

Healthy Review versus Unhealthy Obsession

Breaking up is hard to do. It’s especially hard to do when you feel as if your own brain is your enemy; when the movie that was your life with your ex plays OVER and OVER again.

When we first breakup, we have this horrible experience of thinking and dreaming and constantly mulling about the ex. Though it is crazy-making, it is necessary to process what Freud called “review and relinquishment.” In other words, we have to put up with the horror movie in our head to move on. That is the idea behind the Relationship Inventory. It not only facilitates the review but it makes it less subjective by asking for both good and bad reviews. When your head just picks and chooses what to review, the review can be incomplete and therefore seemingly never ending.

But even if we do the inventory or time has passed, we find the thoughts are still recurrent and intrusive. This ruminating and thinking over and over again about situations that you can’t really do anything about is called obsession. It’s turning things <strong>over and over in your mind searching for answers where there are none. The ruminations are useless and unhelpful. And you really need to acknowledge the obsession and take concrete steps toward addressing it.

Obsession is not the same as reviewing your relationship and different conversations in an effort to be done with it once and for all. We need to go back and learn. We need to review the relationship and see where WE went wrong. We need to review, in a healthy manner, the ex’s part, our part and what we need to take responsibility for and change. We need to write it down and not let the thoughts just pinball around in our heads until we feel crazy. We need to make lists of what we’re thinking about and what we can learn from it.

Are you reviewing in a healthy way to let it go? Or are you obsessing?

Obsession is thinking and re-thinking for no useful purpose. It’s asking questions over and over…often the same questions over and over…where there either are no answers or the answers don’t matter.

What is he/she doing?
Why did he/she move on so quickly?
Does he/she ever think about me?
How could you say A one day and B the next?
What is going on/has gone on?

Getting out of obsession takes discipline and decision. You have to decide that you are going to stop thinking about it. . You need to write about what you need to write about and be done with it. Don’t look at Facebook…not the ex’s Facebook page, not the friends of the ex. No hints to mutual friends to find out what is going on, the random texting. Go No Contact (NC) both actively and passively. If you do not go NC you will find the obsession much harder to combat.

You need to be focused on YOU and if you are not NC this is next to impossible. There is a certain amount of looking at what this other person DID but the important thing is not to see it as what they DID, but what you ALLOWED. This work is about YOU getting well, not what the other person did.

At some point you need to stop dwelling on what was done TO YOU and understand that you need to figure out what it is in you that put you in that position to be treated that way. What is it? Find out and fix it. Stop dwelling on them and what they did.

We need to do the hard, tough work. But we also need to be bringing in the good stuff and building a worthwhile life. If you’re just ruminating over the past and not building something solid in your life, you’re suffering for no good reason.

Stop obsessing about the ex. Stop ruminating. Start working the bad stuff out WHILE working the good stuff in. Get off the dime and into your own life. Think about you and what you want for your future and then go get it!

You have to take a look at the past and see what happened by writing it down, but you also need to get control over your obsessive thoughts and turn your thoughts toward building a new life. Work out the old, work in the new. Healthy review, yes. Unhealthy obsession, no.

You can do this.

If you felt moved, inspired, touched, helped, annoyed, or anything after reading this, please let us know. Our wonderful bloggers really do appreciate your comments and feedback. It’s super easy and takes a minute. Click on comments below.

Posted by Susan J. Elliott on August 3rd, 2010 in Uncategorized | 2 comments