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Juliax33

Question:trying to find a group, any advice?

my name is julia. i am a sophomore in highschool. my two best frinds go to the same school as i do. however, they are very good at making friends and many girls just love them. they are also in the same "group" but i dont know the girls they hang out with at all. thier group of girls are in none of the same classes or lunch period as i am. plus, i can tell they do not like me at all. but, i want to be in that group. any advice?

Asked by Juliax33 on 11/20/08 2 Answers»
eherzer

Answer:

Julia, I can completely understand how you feel! When I was in high school I was painfully shy! I moved while in high school and started my junior year in a new and very different school. I moved from Southern Calif to a small town in Texas and it was a very different world and such different people. It took me awhile to make friends, but I did, and what I found out is that they misunderstood my shyness for me being a snob - multiple people told me that.

I agree with Victoria - smile at people - be approachable.

I also think a great way to make friends is to join groups or clubs at school that interest you. You then become a part of a group and have common interest. Something else I would recommend, which might mortify you - but that is all the more reason to do it ;) Join the debate team. You will be terrified at first, but you will gain confidence with each learning experience, and you will become comfortable in speaking with people and starting conversations. If you like sports pursue that.

Talk to your friends and try to get to know the girls they are friends with. If you make the effort and they are not receptive - are those really friends you would want? How you view yourself is how others will view you too - so think positively. I have a 16 year old son in high school too, and he went through similar feelings when we moved and he had to start a new school. He now has a great circle of friends, and I know you will too.

Answered by: eherzer on 11/21/08
VictoriaB

Answer:

Juliax33

I bet you're wrong about them not liking you. I bet if you smiled at any one of them, they would smile back. You know what they say about assuming.

Can you find a way to contribute to the group in some way? Something you can bring, say, do? Maybe something you can bake and bring to the lunch table (brownies, perhaps?) Just a thought. Food is always a good ice breaker.

Assume you will be welcomed ... and you will!

Answered by: VictoriaB on 11/20/08
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