"I was delighted to learn about First30Days in a recent issue of O Magazine . I was also very impressed by the content found at first30days.com." -Sonya
Read More Testimonials»

Our Being Happier Experts

Michael Anthony

Michael Anthony

Teacher and author of How to be Happy and Have Fun Changing...

Shared by First30Days View Profile»
Tim Ferriss

Tim Ferriss

Entrepreneur and best-selling author of The 4-Hour Workweek

Shared by First30Days View Profile»
M.J. Ryan

M.J. Ryan

Creator of the Random Acts of Kindness series

Shared by First30Days View Profile»

Meet all of our New Directions Experts»

Got a Question?

Q&A

If you have questions about this change, you're in the right place. Our editors, experts, and community of change optimists have answers!

divagoddess

Question:I have a lot of changes going on -physical, financial, educational, mental (before this all started). How do I get everything done efficentlly, without overwhelming myself and shutting down?

I found out I was robbed for my social security, on my birthday Jan 9th. Which ment I had to get a payday loan to get through the month, partly because of my marijuana problem. Because it was my brother who stole my ATM and money - for the second time, I don't have a brother anymore. Anytime I see him (although he's been told not to come to the house or call) it rips my heart out. I'm done he's done too many other things. Then I should've been in school this semester, but something happened to my grant. Also I'm a diabetic on dialysis. I also need a complete mouth reconstruction. It's gotten so bad that I don't get out of my wheelchair and my legs are getting so weak I can't walk unaided.

Asked by divagoddess on 1/25/09 2 Answers»
Brenda Della Casa

Answer:

DivaGoddess,

Life can be so hard for us at times but it is important to remember that all things have a beginning and an end and you will get through this, one step at a time. I know you might be feeling as though you are caught up in a chaotic cloud of emotion and frustration but you will get through the storm, the key is to move through it one step at a time.

Your brother is your brother but he is also an individual who is living his own life, making his own choices, and I am so sorry those choices have brought his loved ones pain and harm. You have a right and an obligation to protect yourself from harm, regardless of who the person is in terms of being related or having been life-long friends.

As for your grant, have you contacted the school, counselors and asked them what can be done? Do you know what the "something" is that happened to the grant? Was there a deadline missed? Can you apply for a reconsideration?

Your health is the number-one most important thing to focus on. Maybe your not being in school right now is a bit of a blessing in that you can focus on getting healthy, your surgery and recovery. Are you in group therapy of some kind or in individual counseling? One or both might prove beneficial.

Again, take everything one step at a time and write out three things you can do each and every day to create the life and the space you need to feel safe and happy.

You're going through so much right now but you're strong enough to get through it and you will emerge even stronger.

Good Luck,

Brenda Della Casa
Author, Cinderella Was a Liar
Link
Link

Answered by: Brenda Della Casa on 6/19/09
irenek

Answer:

Dear divagoddess,
you are going through very serious changes. The first thing you can count on in this cituation is your own optimism. Remember there are a lot of places in the world where people in such circumstaces won't get any social defence. Things are not so bad for you. Concerning to your portrait picture, you are waiting for some releaf and joy. Probably you should let many people know you need their friendship. Remember i believe you'll be strong.

Answered by: irenek on 1/25/09
Got an Answer?