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wad should i do?
Hi, im so confused. btw i just started joining you guys in here. maybe i could get better advised in future. wad im confused now is about my relationship. i have a bf which i know him for almost 6yrs. But now every here and there all my male friends contact me back. And one of my male friend which i ever fall into him ask me for date recently.. I agreed with the date and when out with him..(without my bf knowing) Its been so long i didnt chat with him. roughly around 2yrs. so we had a long talk at a cafe. and so he decide to go to a place whre its more quiet and relaxing. we ended up at his cribes. and thre we go again with our chat and lastly we had sex. oh god!!! this is insane..
This was the very first time im being unfaithful to my 6yr bf. and each time i look into his eye i felt so guilty feeling like telling him the truth.
But i dont want to hurt him at all. Till today im still feel bad. wad sholud i do, not to have this guilt wenever i met him?
Welcome to First30Days! Thanks for sharing your story and being brave.
Here is my advice. Speak your truth. You are not a bad person, you are human. But the most healing thing you can do now is to be authentic. There's no such thing as an inconsequential lie...it always catches up to you.
There is something going on with your current boyfriend that made you accept the date. That is the issue to be healed. You know why you said yes...something is either missing or needs to be talked about. That is the cause of this....the unfaitfulness is just the symptom.
If your boyfriend loves you and is committed to growing with you, then he will want to resolve this. it may even bring you closer. But lies and no communication is a guarantee for no relationship very soon.
Yes it will hurt him, he is also human.
Be kind when you tell him, let him be angry...give him the space to deal with it however he needs to.
Dont have any expectations or hopes of how this will unfold.
Clearly there is some wonderful lesson for both of you to get here. Every relationship we get into is just a way to learn more about ourselves, to reveal our best selves and honesty is always one of the very best part of who we are.
As one person once said to me, when you are vulnerable, you are the most attractive.
You can do this
Ariane